….testing….

Hello everyone. Seems I always end up writing these types of posts when I’ve been gone for a while. I know, a while is a bit much this time. I don’t think I’ve gone this long without blogging before.

I’m in a funk. You see I’m not sure what happened. Okay so I am, Life Happened.

We’ve been busy. But there are TONS of moms who are just as busy, if not busier than I, and find time to blog. I guess part of my problem is I feel like I’m ignoring my family if I sit in my office and blog all night. Because let’s be honest here. I’m not a morning person.

I haven’t forgotten about my blog, I’ve tried to write this post many of times:

Oh how I miss you. I miss my friends that blogging has made, I miss that I don’t get to share my family with the world. I miss how easy it was to just tell you all the little things. There are a lot of things going on in my life right now. And crazy enough, it’s simpler now than it was when things were really rough. But I still have neglected to come here. I’m not sure why. For fear that you’ll all look at me in a different way, or that I won’t get it into the words that I actually want to say. I feel lost. Lost at blogging, lost as a parent, lost as a wife, lost in life. I’m so tired of people thinking that I should be someone I’m not. I’m not perfect. I never have been. But the part that’s the hardest is, I think I should be perfect.

That was just one of the many blog posts, during my darker days. Now that Christmas is right around the corner I’m glad to report that I’m trying to be more positive. I’m trying to be a better mommy, wife, blogger, friend. But not all days are sunny and shiny.

Please just bear with me, as I come back to this journey of  blogging love. Because really I DO miss you all!

I never said...

I could do it all.

But I'm trying and failing miserably. I'm just going to tell all my blog & twitter followers right now, I probably won't be blogging much until at LEAST the first of September. Our lives are a crazy mess right now. I feel like I'm paying the bills so the dog and cats have something to do. You know they talk on the unlimited long distance phone, and watch all 200+ channels we get via direct tv, browse the internet all day long, and of course shower, bathe and do their laundry!

We're not home long enough to enjoy anything. IF I can get a load of laundry done a day I'm doing incredibly AWESOME!!!! But the reality is that I'm barely getting clothes laid out for the kids at night let alone a load of laundry washed. It's horrible, there is laundry sitting in the laundry room that I washed last week sometime waiting for me to fold it. It's amazing we can even find anything to wear! Don't even let me tell you about the dishes that are sitting in the sink!

Our work schedules are just taking us by storm. About as soon as I started working 3 days a week, Joel started a feed trial at work. Oh did I mention he signed me up....without asking....well he says he did, but I don't remember it! So as I was starting my first week of full time (okay so it's really part time but to me it's full time!) we started going back to Joel's work every evening.

The first few nights were only an hour maybe two, two and a half. Lately though we've been putting in 3-4 hours every night. Well unless we get started early it's late when we get home. The kids have been doing great through this all, and have been going with us every other night or so, and then to Grandpa Kessler's on the other nights. The good news...Joel should be done with this feed trial around the end of August first part of September, the bad news....I'm done the 1st of September. So for the next month our schedules will be crazy!

If I'm not commenting on your blog do not feel unloved, I am reading, but probably not taking the time to comment! Keep up the great work, because right now you're all superhero's!